So I'm putting together a small zine for my Alternative Media class. And when I was reading a debate thread earlier, I was struck with inspiration on the topic: a humorous guide to arguing (and winning) online.

I was wondering if anyone had any tips or quotes or suggestions or links for things I could include.

Thanks for any help!!

Okay, so we have several points:

• When arguing, remember that you can't actually see the person, so you can bash them with all sorts of mean comments without worrying that they'll punch you.
• If you're losing, change the subject. Quickly.
• And when you want someone to shut up, use this pic. It's very popular around the internet.

- When someone uses Wikipedia to back up their argument, always remind them that that doesn't count because Wikipedia is unreliable.
- Don't be afraid to make insults personal and highly insulting -- you don't know this person!
- Make sure to dissect every sentence of their post and argue with each of them individually. Arguing about the general point is for losers!
- Overwhelm your opponent with thesaurus abuse. Big, sophisticated words are the true sign of someone who really knows what s/he's talking about.
- Don't forget to type in a sarcastic, condescending manner. That is also another true sign of an expert.
- If you're losing, always bow out by saying something like "I don't have the time to argue with you anymore - it's the Internet, it's stupid!" People will think you have a life! :]

Lol. Thanks. =]

Any others?

• Always quote from sources that lean towards your point of view and pass them off as definitive.
• Try to pass your opinion off as fact whenever possible.
• Set up strawmans and slippery slopes. They'll never know what hit em.
• Speak generally and never offer concrete examples to support your argument in case someone can debunk them.
• Put words in the person's mouth and play it like they said something they really didn't.
• Take a sarcastically conciliatory tone while still continuing your argument.